Wednesday, September 19, 2007

This is going to turn out well


A judge ordered Britney Spears to take twice weekly random drug tests and to see a parenting coach if she wants to maintain custody of her 2 children. For now, the judge upheld the 50/50 custody split between Britney and The Federdouche. He also said that both parties were to restrain "from making derogatory remarks about the other party and the other party's family or significant other..." and he forbid "using corporal punishment with the minor children and from allowing anyone else to do so." In addition, both parents will be assigned a parenting coach and will have to complete a class called Parenting without Conflict.

I'd love to see the look on the parenting coach's face when Britney teeters in drinking a vodka Red Bull, hands Jayden James a pack of cigarettes to play with, and then has Sean Preston zip her up for her night of wild whoring at Hyde nightclub. She'll go, "What? What's wrong with that, y'all?" before she falls flat on her face and slips into unconsciousness for an hour or two while Sean Preston cries and Jayden James plays with light sockets and an empty bottle of Jack.

Seriously, it's not even like this is a joke anymore. I think her kids would probably be better off being raised by a microwave or a kitchen knife.

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