Hey, at least he's better than Taylor Hicks

All I can say is, this guy's co-workers must absolutely hate him, because he says he auditioned at their urging and he sings like a deaf person trying to do opera. There's no way they actually thought he was good enough to be on Idol.

And BTW, Simon totally got breast reduction surgery. Those hairy boobies are half their original size. I guess his new model GF doesn't like looking at a man's ape tits. Go figure.