At last, something to fill the tremendous void left in my soul by the passing of the first season of I Love New York. This show is so brilliant, it makes Stephen Hawking look like a fourth-grader with a learning disability. The formula goes something like this:
a little white dude (Rob) who is presumably famous for something, although I have no idea what (opera? volunteer work? transcendental meditation?) + a big, walleyed black bodyguard from the Dirty Dirty (Big) +a deadbeat "cousin" who sits at home all day smoking pot (presumably) and playing video games + a mini-horse with an attitude problem, and finally, a cute little bulldog= THE BEST HALF HOUR OF TELEVISION IN ALL OF HISTORY.
Seriously. I don't know how they do it. Who comes up with this stuff? Whoever they are, they're so fucking smart it's almost a shame we don't have them step in and run the country. But then they might not have the time to come up with golden plotlines like, "Big reinvigorates his male stripping career with a wig and a velour tracksuit." I don't think we could risk the integrity of our television programming, even if these dudes were doing something like, "saving the world from terrorism." It would upset the cosmic balance. God, we are so lucky to live in America.
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