Were my comments about Paris Hilton too harsh? Perhaps I only made myself look like a jealous old crone who needs to get a life...As a peace offering (though not to Paris) and to prove that I don't simply have a case of anti-celebrity, I'm going to take a moment to commemorate (and I think I can speak for everyone when I say this) a moment I have waited breathlessly for my whole life: Jay-Z, aka Jigga Man, aka the ugliest man alive that you still are kinda, weirdly attracted to, has gotten engaged to his girlfriend, the incomparable, beautiful, somewhat annoyingly ubiquitous Beyonce. Now, not only will the millionaire rap mogul have the hottest chick in the game wearing his chain (haha, I'm so clever), he'll shell out over $3 million for a lavish ceremony on the Caribbean island of Anguilla which will reportedly include (according to hollywoodrag.com) $300,000 worth of Beluga caviar, lobster and italian truffles, and, of course, the most fabulous wedding dress us mere mortals have ever laid eyes on. Not to mention the ring, which will probably be large enough to clobber a small infant to death. Sources say it will be "the hip-hop wedding to end all hip-hop weddings" (www.exposay.com).
Oh, the glamour of it all. The wonders of people who have so much money they sit around all day and think of creative ways to spend it...Nay, I'm not a celebrity hater. I'm a celebrity-obsessed simpleton like everyone else, maybe even more so. Okay, definitely even more so.
Word on the street is that Miss B's dress is going to be modeled after Princess Diana's, and while I can understand her desire to have the ultimate princess gown, I think she would just look so smashing in a long, lean column dress that highlights her ample derriere. Column dresses are huge for fall, but I think they're also classic enough to avoid the decade-after oh-my-god-what-was-I-thinking syndrome. Here's one that I really like from the consummate professional: Vera Wang.
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