What's Gayer than Gay?

Gawker just unearthed footage of a birthday bash the Church of Scientology threw for Tommy Girl Cruise in 2004. There's just so much gay here, I don't know where to begin. He's singing and reenacting dance moves from Risky Business, for Chrissake. The only way it could possibly be gayer is if David Miscavage* jumped out of a giant cake wearing pasties and a thong wielding a huge, black dildo for Tommy Girl's ass. What am I saying, that probably happened later.

*Btw, David Miscavage is the guy in the white t-shirt sitting next to Cruise. He's the head of the Cult of Scientology. And a total douche.